So funny.

This is short.

Or, Why I Shouldn't Write Poetry:

Oh, Sweet, Sweet Pepsi.
If you were a woman, would you be my bride?
If you were a sparrow, would you sit outside my window?
If you were a song, would you lull me to sleep?
If you were a horse, could I ride you all night?

Love is like a ham sandwich,
Leave it out in the rain and it gets soggy,
Bite into it and it squishes,
Love is indeed the wonderful pork product in between baked goodness.

You find all kinds of neat stuff when you are getting ready to move. I have a large box that contains a ton of my papers and things from college. During that time I wrote many short stories, and a few poems. I want to share the poems with you.

Now, I must first explain why I wrote these. I am not a poet, and I never have been. However, during my time at college I went to an open mic night. There lots of people stood up and recited some truly awful poetry that they wrote, thinking that it was good. I had an epiphany. If these people were trying to write good poems and ended up with bad poetry, perhaps if I tried to write bad poetry I would end up with good poetry.

Hence this category.