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SwabThanks to the pandemic, I’ve been able to work from home a lot, which I quite like. I never really thought I would like it, to be honest. I figured I’d be distracted and just did not want to mix work and home.

Turns out it is fantastic. However, I do come into the office fairly regularly (I’m typing this in the office right now, don’t tell my boss). This morning I headed to work and made my traditional stop: the COVID testing center.

Every time I come to campus, I get tested for COVID. Why? Because we’re in a pandemic, silly! And why not? It is free, easy, and quick.

I went in today, checked in, got my nasal swab and tube, and headed to the person who would observe my test. He asked me if I had done this before, and I nodded.

As I struggled to free the swap from its plastic (I always feel like I tell the person I’ve done this before, and then it appears as if I’ve never encountered plastic wrapping as I try to get that damned swab out), he mumbled something.

I leaned in and said, “Excuse me?” He looked at me, shook his head, and pointed to his ear.

Then I thought, “Dear god! He’s deaf, and I’ve insulted him. But how will he confirm my date of birth since I’m wearing a mask and don’t know sign language? Should I know sign language? Maybe I could type it on my phone and show him the screen. Oh man, I hope he didn’t mind that I assumed he could hear.”

He then continued with his phone call using the earbud that he had pointed out to me.

Ahh, he wasn’t deaf. Just rude.

I felt better as I liberated the swab and shoved it into my nostrils one after the other.

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