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October 2005

September 2005

Pants: a necessary evil

I am wearing pants today at work.

I usually enjoy wearing shorts (though the weather is on the cusp of becoming a little too crisp for shorts), however; today was a mandated pants day.

Don't get me wrong, I don't want to walk around naked all the time, just most of the time.  Pants are great for what they do, but there must be a better way people.  Come on, it is the frickin' 21st century here!

Paul: Blankbaby's 4000th commenter

That's right, we have a winner in the Blankbaby 'Race to 4000 comments.'  Paul, frequent reader and infrequent commenter, has left the 4000th comment on this little old blog:

4000th comment

Paul won with this comment wondering if 'retarded' is once again a socially acceptable word (I think it is still off limits).  Retarded or not, he has his choice from the prizes, though he has informed me that he needs  little time to mull over which one he tickles his fancy.

Congrats to Paul, and 5000 here we come!

Oh, and in case Glenn, Karin, Emily, or Thad were wondering: yes, this does mean you were incredibly close to winning.

The thrill of the hunt

braininajar.jpgI like my job, and for many reasons. The people are nice (and they read my blog, hi people!), my boss is fantastic (and he reads my blog, hi boss!), and the environment is stimulating (environments can't read, so screw them). What I do won't save the world, eradicate poverty, or even make the world a better place (well perhaps it will in some very small and far removed way), however it can make me happy.

The one aspect of my job I enjoy most is problem-solving and for entirely selfish reasons. I happen to enjoy problem-solving, and not for the process (that sucks) rather I enjoy the feeling I get AFTER the problem is solved. You see, I have a fickle one track mind. It doesn't latch onto many things, but when it does it won't let go. I keep thinking about whatever it is, over and over again. It won't stop until I find a solution.

Oh, but when I find the solution.

I've never snorted cocaine off the chest of a naked angel but I imagine that would approximate the sensation I experience after I solve a particularly knotty problem.


This is my 2001st post on good old Blankbaby, and since I reached 1000 posts early in Nov. 2004, it seems that my blogging has increased. Who knew it would last this long? From humble beginnings to.. well continued humbleness, it has been a crazy ride.

So, dear gentle readers, what has been your favorite post out of the last 1000? All of them are pure gold, if you me but International Dialing Vexes Me still makes me chuckle.

I should so something tomorrow to celebrate this milestone, but I won't. 15 million people not interested in you

Terrified ScottSo, a while back I did the whole internet dating thing, and by 'did' I mean I put my profile up at I just say an advert (as the Brits say) for that proclaims they have 15 million people, and the right one for me!

It seems that 15 million people had the chance to get a piece of Scott (well, 7.5 million, since I assume only half are women) and they collectively said, 'Eh, no thanks.'

I've already listed why I would make an ok boyfriend, so I say to you ladies of the internets: 'You're not good enough for me anyway!'

But if you wanted to meet for drinks or whatever I would totally be down with that.

Scott's emotional state: ecstatic

My freakin' Wifi cards with my Powerbook again! Hurrah!

What does that mean for you, gentle readers?

Absolutely nothing!

However, for me it means that I can do many things that I couldn't do for the last few weeks:

      Stream my MP3 collection to my home stereo
      Surf the web from anywhere in the apartment
      Surf the web from Rittenhouse Square (theoretically)

Ah, the list goes on and on. If I weren't a hermit I would totally be computing outside of my domicile.

Let the navel gazing commence

I found this via Anonymous Rowhouse, and I thought I would give it a whirl.

What is this? Why, a meme about blogging.

1. Do you try to look hot when you go to the grocery store just in case someone recognizes you from your blog?

Someone once recognized me in the grocery store from my blog, but I doubt I looked hot (you would have to ask her). I never try to look hot (and I succeed!) so I have to go with 'no.'

2. Are the photos you post Photoshopped or otherwise altered?

They should be, but they are completely unadulterated.

3. Do you like it when creeps or dorks email you?

I love dorks and I hate creeps, however, I do like getting email.

4. Do you lie in your blog?

Me? Lie? Never!

5. Are you passive-aggressive in your blog?

That is such a typical question.

6. Do you ever threaten to quit writing so people will tell you not to stop?

I did once, but it feel flat and I have learned my lesson. I ain't quitting, no matter how much you want me to!

7. Are you in therapy? If not, should you be? If so, is it helping?

Nope, but I have always thought about it. I don't like talking about my feelings though, and I bet hugging is involved in some way. I'll just continue repressing my emotions and bottling them up until one day the vile, black liquid that is created when emotions are under great pressure bubbles up and explodes and I just frickin' flip out.

8. Do you delete mean comments? Do you fake nice ones?

I only delete comment spam, and I never fake it (that's right, ladies).

9. Have you ever rubbed one out while reading a blog? How about after?

Rubbed one out? Isn't that mob talk for killing someone? I have never killed anyone whilst reading a blog or not.

10. If your readers knew you in person, would they like you more or like you less?

Allow me to coin a phrase, 'to know me is to love me.' Sure, it doesn't apply to me, since I'm a bastard and all, but most people who read this know me.. I suppose it has little impact.

11. Do you have a job?

I sure do, I was Blankbabied!

12. If someone offered you a decent salary to blog full-time without restrictions, would you do it?

Yes, yes I would.

13. Which blogger do you want to meet in real life?

C.K., since I have been working with him for awhile and I have yet to meet him face to face (though he did tell me that he dreamt about us meeting for the first time and I was thinner than him so he got mad at me).

14. Which bloggers have you made out with?

None... yet (know what I'm saying, ladies? Eh? Eh?).

15. Do you usually act like you have more money or less money than you really have?

Probably more since I have very poor budgeting skills.

16. Does your family read your blog?

My mom reads my boggle, and my brother has visited at least once. The rest of my family has no idea about it (Dad is dead, though he may be reading from BEYOND THE GRAVE! Spooky).

17. How old is your blog?

I have been using Typepad since August 2003.

18. Do you get more than 1000 page views per day? Do you care?

Nope, and nope. "Screw you people," has always been Blankbaby Media's slogan.

19. Do you have another secret blog in which you write about being depressed, slutty, or a liar?

No, but I should since I am quite the slut.

20. Have you ever given another blogger money for his/her writing?

No, I haven't.

21. Do you report the money you earn from your blog on your taxes?

Blankbaby costs me money.

22. Is blogging narcissistic?

Enough of your questions, what do you think of me?

23. Do you feel guilty when you don't post for a long time?

Define 'long time.' I'm a pretty frequent poster.

24. Do you like John Mayer?

John who now?

25. Do you have enemies?

Why, what have you heard?

26. Are you lonely?

Sometimes, but aren't we all alone?

27. Why bother?

I've said it before, and I'll say it again, this blog has changed my life. And yes, I'm resisting the urge to write some snarky comment to followup on that.

Well, that's that. I'm not 'tagging' anyone because people don't like it. Do it if you want to, and you don't have to answer all the questions.

I is dum

MozartAs this week has progressed I have been getting dumber and dumber.  I don't know why, but I seem to be letting slip my tenuous grasp of English as well as common sense and s ince I'm not all that smart at the best of times this recent development is very troubling. 

I, for one, refuse to sit idly by and take up permanent residence in Morontown so I listened to Mozart all day yesterday in an effort to boost my flagging intelligence.  Sadly, I must report that this effort has been for naught.  I'm still dumber than I have ever been (except for a brief time during the summer of '83, but we don't speak of that).

What should I do to get more smarter?!

Wikiquote: for all your quoting needs

WikiquoteWe all know and love Wikipedia (even though they aren't big fans of Blankbabied, the heathens) since it is required by internet law, however, until very recently I had never heard of Wikiquote.

What's Wikiquote you ask?  Why, a repository of quotes from different movies, political and historical figures, and what have you.  Around these parts it has become incredibly popular to quote from Anchorman, and Wikiquote has oodles of quotes from the film.  It also has a page dedicated to Lanark: A Life in Four Books, which is a relatively obscure novel that I enjoyed immensely.

Ahh, the power of the interweb!

I feel I must also link to the Star Trek section, for my own future reference.

I leave you with a quote from Lanark:

Space is infinite to men without destinations.

Internationally Known Blankbaby

FoB (Friend of Blankbaby) William B. (not everyone wants their name plastered all over the interwebs) emailed me to let me know that the blog article featuring yours truly was in Sept. 19th's Virgin Islands Daily News.

Ahh, the life of an internationally known blogger.

Plus it was featured in the newspaper with the cutest name ever, the Modesto Bee. All together now: 'Awwwww.' However, it was titled 'A blog can help you stand out, sometimes to your detriment,' and that's a downer.

Excuse me whilst I have one of my minions fetch me a Pepsi and an ice cream sandwich.

3 home cooked meals in October

gourmetcookbook.jpgSpeaking of idiotic ideas, I'm going to be making at least 3 meals a week in October from scratch. That in and of itself isn't much to write about, however when you add the fact that I will be making at least 3 meals a week using only recipes found in the Gourmet Cookbook things get a little more interesting (not that much more interesting, I will admit, but a little more interesting).

This little project will serve many purposes but mostly I think it will be healthier in general for me, and it will probably cost me less in the long run. Plus, I enjoy cooking, which jibes nicely with the fact that I enjoy eating.

Things I am looking forward to cooking:

  • 21st Century Beef Wellington (that's just how I roll)
  • Carrots Vichy
  • Black-and-White Cookies (dessert is a food group, right?)
  • Saltimbocca
  • Mortadella and Truffle Stuffed Pork Loin with Rosemary Potatoes

I could go on and go, but I won't. I will, however, post what I made and what I thought of it (and perhaps a picture of two).