Blankbaby

The New York Times reviews The Covenant

This has got to be the oddest NY Times movie review I have ever read.

Maybe they should have called it the 'True Believers Diaries'

The other day I was watching The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement (don't judge me) and I was startled by what I saw on the screen. The climax of the movie happens when Mia Thermopolis, played by the always cast as the ugly duckling Anne Hathaway, is to be crowned queen. The will she or won't she tension is running high as various people fill the hall were the coronation is set to happen (I won't tell you what happens). I was half paying attention when I saw something that startled me.

"I know that old dude," thought I as I rewound the movie (thanks to the magic of digital cable). Sure enough, it looked like some random dude part was being played by none other than Stan 'I created the Fantastic Four, Spiderman, and the X-Men' Lee. A quick trip to IMDB confirmed it.

Odd, huh?

Match Point

Earlier today I did a little shopping and in my travels I saw that Match Point is out on DVD. I meant to see this movie when it was in the theater but I never got around to it (I'm a busy man). I then made up my mind that I would watch it tonight thanks to the magic of On Demand.

I demanded that my TV play the movie for me and play the movie it did (and so I watched it).

If I didn't know that this was a Woodie Allen movie I wouldn't have guessed it. The normal tips that you are watching an Allen movie (it is set in NYC, Woodie Allen is in it, or if he isn't there is a character that is him) were missing though the themes (love, money, and sex) were par for the course.

Overall, I thought this movie was very well done (though I think that Jonathan Rhys Meyers is kind of creepy looking, which works in this movie). The ending leaves you hanging a bit, but it ties in well with the theme of 'I'd rather be lucky than talented.'

I know many people aren't big fans of Woodie but who doesn't feel like this every once and awhile?

Superman Returns

Speaking of being alone, the workday ended early for me on Monday so I thought, 'What is a young, attractive man like myself going to do with a few hours free in the afternoon?' The answer was clear: go see a movie (I actually typed 'go see a woman' at first, which isn't what I did but perhaps my subconscious is telling me something).

With no woman to see, I went to see the 3:30 showing of Superman Returns, the fairly controversial new addition to the superhero movie cannon. I'd heard all the talk of this movie making Superman gay (which I didn't see at all, I mean the dude spends the entire movie pining for Lois Lane), the Christ aspect being played up a bit too much (this I agree with. Yes, Superman, we know you're better than we are. Now frickin' save us and keep the preaching to a minimum, ok?), and the kerfuffle over 'Truth, justice, and all that stuff' (which I thought was odd but I suppose the 'American Way' might not play well in Iranian movie theaters).

Anyway, I found a seat in the theater and awaited the movie to start. A nice young lady, who was alone, sat in a seat next to me (well there was an empty seat betwixt us). I thought to myself, 'Ahh, a young woman who would go to see Superman by herself, truly my kind of woman.' I could have sworn she looked at me a few times, but me being me I ignored her the whole time (it is my strategy with the ladies). Anyway, enough of my lady misadventures (if that can even count as a misadventure) and onto the movie!

Now, there might be a spoiler here or there in the remainder of this post, so if you haven't seen the movie and want to go in unbiased stop reading now.

The Good in the movie:

The opening credits: I loved the fact that the opening titles used the same font and theme as the Reeve movies. It was a nice touch, though I can't imagine actually watching the title sequence at an Imax movie theater. I got dizzy watching it and I was just at a regular old movie theater.

The Daily Planet Building: updated, but still it felt like the good old Daily Planet (and 'Great Caesar's ghost' was uttered so they get a couple of points for that).

Jimmy Olsen: Annoying, as he should be.

Lex Luthor: Well, Kevin Spacey really. He does a great job with what little role he gets. Lex is almost always depicted listening to classical music, something I've always liked about the character. He surrounds himself with elegance and yet he is, at his core, a thug.

Gotham: News reports list a number of cities that Superman is thwarting crime in since his return and Gotham is listed as one of them. Cool, though I wonder what Batman has to say about that.

Not so good:

The plot: It was flimsy at best. Oh! Superman is back! Hurrah! Oh yeah, Lex Luthor is doing some crap too. Boo!

Lex Luthor: His plan is lame, lame, lame! As I point out above, Kevin Spacey is a great Lex but he is squandered in this movie. Lex and his plan seem like an after though to counteract the Superman/Lois story-line.

Superman: I'm pretty sure he doesn't need to breathe (though I could be wrong). That bothered me greatly (as you well know I am a gigantic geek).

Overall, it was a fun movie but Batman Begins was much better.

Update: It turns out that Superman originally fought for 'truth and justice.' 'The American Way' jazz was added during WWII (which makes sense), so I can forgive the film makers for axing it. Via Dave.

An Inconvenient Truth

We all know that I am not a political person, nor am I a treehugger. Politics disgusts me, and I think the outdoors would be far better if it were inside. That being said, An Inconvenient Truth is a movie that everyone should see. It is eye-opening, stunning, and frightening.

Sure, some may let the occasional snipe at the Republicans blot out what the movie is really about and that is a shame. This movie isn't about politics (though Al Gore mentions a number of times that politics is part of the solution), rather it is about the very future of our civilization.

I'll say that again: the future of our civilization.

No, I haven't lost my mind.

We, as a species, have had an incredible impact on the planet, so much so that we are changing the very climate. I'm not sure why some people find this so hard to believe, but it is true. The planet is getting hotter and we are to blame.

I'm not a spiritual person, I believe in science. Science tells us that we are getting ourselves into a real mess, however, we can turn things around. Thoughtful use of technology and public policy can make the environment safe again (and create jobs at the same time). What a shocking idea.

This movie really sparked something in me, and I hope to change certain things about the way I lead my life for the good of the planet.

Anyway, I have rambled enough. Bottom line: see the movie.

Oh, and thanks to Marisa for inviting me to see a screening of the movie!

Brokeback Mountain

I would like to see all 5 of the movies nominated for 'Best Picture,' and to further that goal I saw 'Brokeback Mountain' last night along with Marisa, Sherri, and Luna (Howard went with us but since he has seen Brokeback already he opted for 'Tristam Shandy,' which I would also like to see; perhaps sometime this week).

The movie started at 7pm, but we got there at 7:10pm (for a variety of reasons, so we had to sit in the first row. Not the best place to see a movie, but it wasn't that bad.

So, gay cowboys, how can that be sad? I mean, you're combining two things which are fun:

• Gay folks are known for being happy
• Cowboys live the life of freedom, and what boy doesn't pretend he is a cowboy?

How on earth can you go wrong? This movie should be a laugh a minute, right? Nope.

My initial reaction, as we were walking out of the theater: 'Well. That was a downer.'

I don't want to ruin the ending for anyone, but let's just say that these gay cowboys do not ride off into the sunset holding hands. Point of fact, they never go anywhere holding hands. They are forced to go on 'fishing trips' in the mountains were they can hold hands (amongst other things) so that the local folks (and their wives) won't see them being gay cowboys.

Even though it was a downer, it was a very good movie (duh), and I heard several sobs in the theater at various times as well as a number of people drying tears as the lights came up in the theater.

If you're looking for a light, fun, gay cowboy movie then don't see 'Brokeback Mountain'. If, on the other hand, you're looking for a heart wrenching love story... then 'Brokeback Mountain' is the right movie to make those tears trickle down.

Check out the trailer, if you have been living under a rock.

Verdict: 4 out of 4 Blankbabies

Coen Brothers Collection

I bought the Coen Brothers Collection at some point this weekend because it cost $40, and you get 4 movies. If I know my division, and I think I do, that comes out to roughly $3.99 a movie. How could I pass that up? I couldn't, and you know it, the American people know it, we all know it.

I should note that I am a big Coen Brothers fan. My favorite movie of theirs? The Hudsucker Proxy, of course. You know, for kids.

What movies are included in said collection? Here they are:

• Blood Simple - The Coens first movie (I believe), I saw it long ago and don't remember much about it.
• The Big Lebowski - The Dude abides. What more does one need to say?
• The Man Who Wasn't There - Shot in black and white, so I am sure that scared some folks again, but I think this movie deserved much better than it got at the box office.
• Intolerable Cruelty - Not their best work, but it was very entertaining and it has Catherine Zeta-Jones in it, so why wouldn't I watch it?

Overall, a fine way to spend $40. Plus I'm thinking of having a little 'Coen Brothers' screening this Saturday. Watch the Hudsucker Proxy and one other movie, and whomever wants to stop by can stop by (and if no one is interested I'll still be watching some good movies).

Cheesiest Line I have heard in a movie commercial to date

"Doctor, why couldn't you save her?"

"Because there are no injections against the Devil"

Thank you, The Exorcism of Emily Rose.

Best. Movie. Review. Ever.

Roger Ebert really didn't like Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo. The whole review is very funny, but since I know you're very busy here is the best line:

Speaking in my official capacity as a Pulitzer Prize winner, Mr. Schneider, your movie sucks.

Yeah, this is going to suck

What do you get when you take a first person shooter with no plot and make it into a movie? Well, the Doom Trailer tells us you get The Rock (or Dwayne as I like to call him) in another mindless yawnfest.